So I finished my first Psych Script, and it was so much fun that I wanted to write another. So I sat in my room for a good hour or so and tried to think of ideas that would make a good Psych episode. It was no use, but as I went to bed last night, I had a great idea. So I jotted it down and let myself sleep. Now I'm ready to write!

The premise: Somebody is finding and killing each and every woman by the name of Sarah Connor.

As I write, I would greatly appreciate it if you guys helped me out by thinking of alternate titles. "Shawn and Gus Meet the Terminator" just doesn't feel right to me. I'm thinking maybe "Terminator 4: He's Baaack...", "Terminator: The Shawn Spencer Chronicles", etc...

EDIT #1: And... the Teaser is FINISHED! Please read, everybody! Shawn and Gus Meet the Terminator

EDIT #2: I'm DONE!
Shawn and Gus Meet the Terminator

Please note that I own all rights to this script. It may not be used, duplicated, sold, edited, or ANYTHING short of read by anyone at anytime.

That being said, please enjoy! I would also appreciate feedback.

Please also note that this is the first draft, so there may be some spelling & grammar or technical errors.

rofl sounds great! Do you have a teaser yet? C-=

Not yet. Right now I'm outlining and such. I'll try to have one done today.

Okay good luck! C-=

Any title ideas while you're waiting?

I don't know. I haven't seen any of the terminator movies, I just know that they have something to do with Sarah Conner and robots and they are kind of sci-fi, I think. I'll try to think of something! C-=
Not a very good idea but "Terminated: The Sarah Conner Chronicles"? I don't know, like all the Sarahs are dying? rofl I'm not very good at title namings...

Basically, and you will need to know this for the show to make more sense, the first movie is about a robot from the future who is sent to kill everybody with the name Sarah Connor.

And... the Teaser is FINISHED! Please read, everybody!
Shawn and Gus Meet the Terminator

Now that's funny!! Yeah..you got good titles! Or...

"He Won't Be Back"

De-Terminator

Me and My Shadow (sorry...was thinking of a Mel Brooks movie)

What's funny?

Hmm... "He Won't Be Back"... No, I need something that people will be able to draw the Terminator from. That's not direct enough.

"De-Terminator"... Not quite...

"Me and My Shadow"? rofl!

What's funny? The fact that Shawn and Gus would meet up with the Terminator. Lots of girly screams to come (I hope).

Oh...got ya. Nah..I can't think of anything cool that's literal. I'm a subtle girl (yeah right!!)

Ooh... Don't worry. For you, I will add lots of girly screams. Did you read the teaser?

Yes! Great teaser! I love "Tough Naked Man"! LOL!!

Thanks! I love those girly screams as they run away. It's what drew me to the show! More more more!!

And do you know how to submit your work to the network? I'm sure there's a process you have go through. Good luck, you're truly awesome.

I look forward to more and I'll also provide feedback on your other script!

Haha. I wanted to add another adjective to "Tough, Naked Man", but I wasn't sure.

I don't know how to submit my work to the network, but even if I did, it's unlikely that somebody would even look at it. Does anybody have any ideas?

Here's a link for one way to do it.

Script Submissions

I had a friend submit his script and it was used for Star Trek Next Generation. He had an agent though.

Anyone else have ideas? Info?

It looks like a site for writers who want to do original shows.

Yay! Teaser is finished! Will read! And I probably won't watch the actual movies; I get freaked out fairly easily. "The Devil is in the Details... and the Upstairs Bedroom" Psych episode is about the worst I can do. Sorry. *sheepish smile* But if I enjoyed that episode without watching "The Exorcist" and "Tues. the 17th" without watching "Fri. the 13th", I'm sure I will be fine! Sorry; but on another note, the teaser is great! rofl Luffed the tough, naked man!! lol

It would definitely be more enjoyable if one watches the movies first. Besides, The Terminator isn't a horror movie. It's an action movie, and as far as I know, there aren't any scary parts. However, I'm pretty sure that it will work just fine if one doesn't watch the movies.

No keep reading. They had several info on different types of shows.

Bottom line, I guess the best advice is to find an agent.

EDIT: And I hope you get in there...I would love to see your scripts get to the screen!

Bleh. I wish Steve Franks would read my scripts...

Thanks for your support and help! I'd love to see them become episodes, too.

Teaser is awesome! I LOVE any banter between Lassie and Shawn. Can't think of any titles though....

You love the banter now? Just wait; it gets better. The next scene features Shawn and Lassiter. In a car. Alone.

BTW, have you read my other script?

I read the teaser and I love it. Especially the "Tough, Naked Man".

The only title I can think of is "Hasta la Vista, Shawny" (I have no idea of I spelled that right)

EDIT: Lassie and Shawn? Alone? In a car?

I'm intrigued.

That is a T2 quote, but I love it!

Yup. And Shawn reveals his "true feelings" for Lassie. lol

*gasp* Is there gonna be hugging? 'Cause if there is I'm gonna be rofl-ing with tears in my eyes.

No, but if they really were to do that, Lassie would pull away immediately and start yelling most likely

EDIT: First of all, I should really go back and watch all the Terminator movies we have (which is all of them except for the newest with Christian Bale as John Connor).

Second of all, what if the Tough, Naked Man found someone named Sara Conners, who just might happen to be the sister of Trish Connors from the episode "Forget Me Not"? That would be a weird twist.

No, but I will definitely add some. At first, Shawn just patted Lassie on the shoulder, but I'll change that.

Yay! I can't wait to read it

This sounds really promising! Write fast!

I'm a little more than half-done now. It's taking longer than the first one because this one requires more research. Fun research, though. I watched the Terminator earlier.

Yayz! Not only is there Shassie shipping, but I wrote myself completely unintentionally into Shules shipping! They spend the night together in a house. lol. Of course, it's for business, not pleasure, as Shawn would like, lol.

EDIT: Yes, they are alone. lol

Suuure, completely unintentionally

It was, actually. I admit that I kind of jumped at the opportunity, though. I'm a big Shules fan.

rofl gahahaha! Sound's funny! Can't wait! C-=

As am I, I'm a shules fan though for story reasons they have to keep the tension otherwise it's not as interesting. As long as they don't pull a bones thing where in the 4th season the girl is oblivious to the whole relationship thing... that was so dumb ( my friend wanted me to watch bones.... the stupidness was just too much)

So oooh that will be interesting....I'm curious bourne how you figure out motives....Ive allways wanted to write a detective story maybe even a psych script but motives are hard for me.. any tips haha


allright

applejacks out

I honestly can't tell you how I figure out motives. All I start a story with is a premise (the basic plot). While I write, it just comes to me, and if something doesn't work, I think of other things until something clicks. This includes motive.

YAYZ! I'm almost done!

YAYZ! Tell us when! lol

I'm DONE!
Shawn and Gus Meet the Terminator

Please note that I own all rights to this script. It may not be used, duplicated, sold, edited, or ANYTHING short of read by anyone at anytime.

That being said, please enjoy! I would also appreciate feedback.

Please also note that this is the first draft, so there may be some spelling & grammar or technical errors.

I am deeply sorry, but I did not get to add as many girly screams as I hoped to. I did add one, but I wish I could have added more.

ok, can i just say that youre awesome?!

i actually lol'd in a few places, esp the pancakes

i could even picture the whole thing in my head, so big thumbs up to you

Thanks!

I'm thinking about changing the title to "Shawn Meets the Terminator", since Gus never did.

I'm thinking about changing the title to "Shawn Meets the Terminator", since Gus never did.[/quote]
Come on, guys... Is nobody else going to read it?

I am! lol at least, I'm trying! I've been busy and am like in the middle of it. It's really really good!

You don't say! I never would've guessed.
No, kidding. So am I



Well, if you're going to mention Bones you should and probably also do know that keeping the tension for four seasons without resolving it gets boring and feels forced and artificial. It's just not a realistic way to portray a budding relationship, not even for TV standards. I'm sure the Psych writers will pull off a convincing balance between the two extremes, though. They've shown they're capable of amazing things. At least they've avoided the mistake of keeping The Girl oblivious of the whole relationship, since Juliet's the one who took a leap of faith and revealed *her* feelings to our Hero. So they're both overtly aware. Which means one potential Bones-pitfall has been averted
Sorry if I tend to ramble on about this sort of thing. I've lurked here long enough to know that Shawn/Juliet has been discussed to pieces already, but what strikes me about this 'ship is that I actually manage to stay positive about it over the course of four seasons, whereas I sometimes succumb to cynical thoughts about other show's 'ships, e.g. because of bad writing. So I find it remarkable that the Psych writers, in my opinion, have pulled it all off rather nicely - at least...so far.
Maybe it's because Shawn/Juliet isn't the main focus of the show, that they can afford more experimenting without immediately impacting the main body of the show. Or something like that.

-

EDITED to add my feedback of your script. Grab some popcorn; it's quite the read .

Allright. Like I said, my feedbacks can be long, but it’s only because I find so many good things in your scripts and I just want to list them all this time. Because I figured feedback also includes praise, not just constructive criticism.

First of all, like I said before, I like the subtle hints of Shawn/Juliet you thrown in. Like the ‘hint of remorse’ or the little moments you give them throughout the script; I can’t decide whether they *actually* do subtle ones like yours on the show, or that I, the ‘shipper, just misinterpret the show and you actually pull them off better than the show does.
In any case, it’s good to see that you care about continuity by putting in little things like that.

The whole ‘Strapping?....’ exchange. made me laugh; it’s a very Shawn thing to say and I could immediately see him saying that in my head, like he would on screen.

The whole notion of the Terminator being a warning from the future about an actual Terminator coming to our time…I must admit I started daydreaming about that a bit and the whole idea… it’s just priceless.

The way you portray Lassiter’s reaction to Shawns antics in the car, reminds me a great deal of dr. Cox on Scrubs. Which is a good thing

For some reason I love it that Gus would ask Shawn, not Lassiter, where Juliet is.

Shaved Pink Labradoodle, nice. Does anyone even know what a labradoodle is?

“Go start the car, just in case” That made me laugh for a good twenty seconds .

Shawn’s worrying over Juliet going undercover reminded me of Tuesday the 17th, when she is about to run outside. Again, a nice exchange.

The first conversation in the house is nice. Actually, both are. Again a nice continuity thing how Jules has gotten used to his flirting, even after mr. Yang, and doesn’t get exasperated anymore when he says something like about ‘I would’ve asked for a quiet place…’
Although, putting an arm around her shoulder still goes too far

I’m not an expert on police procedure, so you’d have to ask TexasArtChick to be sure, but I’m not sure that a…what is it, an undercover operation? that has been set up to lure a killer out of hiding culminates on the police officer put there to catch the guy running away and even shouting *go!* at Shawn to start driving. It’s not much of a ‘trap’ like that, is it? It does provide a nice moment with her touching Shawn’s arm, but still. I’d also think she’d at least pull out her sidearm when she thinks a killer is approaching.
Maybe you could spin it in such a way that Juliet goes ‘round the back of the house to surprise the killer, and asks Shawn to stay in the kitchen to distract him. Then you could still have the throwing of the pan, the screaming of the Shawn, and the humiliation of the Lassiter, and Juliet gets to show off the fact that she’s a really brave copper. And then when Shawn reaches the car, Juliet calls him back saying it was only Lassiter, or something. You don’t even have to remove the little moment between them if Shawn doesn’t want her to go outside or something. I’m so obviously not a writer, but that’s just my take on things.

And another batch of Shawn/Juliet interaction…PLUS a high speed car chase! This just keeps getting better and better!
How does the man rip off the door of a car if he is not a real robot?

Awww a hug. I have goosebumps. Sad perhaps, but true.

The ending; golden. What’s frustrating is that you apparently are not going to do anything beyond all the teasing. (you said you didn’t feel that was your place to do, right?)
You *really* are like the Psych writers

Oops, that turned out to be a bit longer than expected. Ah well, tell me what you think of it, then I’ll consider that in my feedback on your next script

Finally finished reading it. I read slow.

Anyway, it was good! I was definitely lol-ing at some parts Plus, insane villains are the best.

Read it, and ya know what? Awesome!

I especially love the pancake thing and all the jokes made by Shawn to annoy Lassie ("He thinks I'm cute.").

I agree with Giant_Simba about not having enough back-up for Jules when she's in the house. It might ruin the Shules moment a little, but it would be more realistic.

I seriously think you should find some way to send this and the other story you wrote to the Psych writers (if you haven't already). They would totally give you credit for it, too. And it would be on tv! For a million other people to see! That would be the coolest thing in the world!

Thank you so much for taking the time to give me a detailed feedback; it almost always helps.


I have noticed subtle hints between Shawn and Juliet on the show, but they are indeed subtle.


I actually kinda considered having the killer be an actual "Terminator", but I dismissed the thought immediately. It would be fun to write, but silly.


I haven't seen Scrubs, so I'll take your word for it as a good thing.


Yes; a Labradoodle is just a mix between a Labrador and a Poodle.



I really don't think it was too far after everything they've been through. *shrugs*


I agree. I should have kept that in mind, but I was really trying to focus on adding as much humor as possible, so I was thinking more about the Shawn vs. Lassiter experience rather than police procedure. I will change that. *changes* Changed and re-uploaded. You can reread that part if you'd like.


He's big and muscular. I've seen big and muscular people rip off doors on TV all the time, and I figure even if they really can't do that in real life, Psych is a TV show, too.


Right. One of the rules of writing a spec script (what these are) is that you cannot write anything that majorly changes anything about the show. Shawn and Juliet getting together would be one of those changes.


The length was awesome. Thanks again for your amazing feedback!

*sighs* I would love for these scripts to end up as episodes, but there is a long and complicated process to go through, and even after all that, it's unlikely it will be made.

Can I just say, LOVED IT!!!!

- Totally loved the pancake scene "oh snap"
- Great banter for Shawn and Lassie
- Thank you for putting the "girly scream" in there for me
- Loved the Kyle Reese thing. I memorized this movie (was one of my first blockbuster as as sophmore in college).
- Great action

The one thing of note, Gus doesn't know how to ride a motorcycle, but that's a minor point. No biggy at all.

Great job! I'll catch up on your other script! (again, get that agent man)

Girly screams are awesome! *fistbump*
*phew* I thought I was going on a stretch with the whole Kyle Reese thing.

Gus doesn't know how to ride a motorcycle? *headdesk* I should have known. *goes to change* Changed and re-uploaded. You can re-read, if you wish.

Agent man?

Nah that was spot on! LOVED IT!!


YOU...you need to get an agent.

Oh, yeah... I do.

omg!
that is a really awesome episode!!
i wish they would really make an episode out of it!
it was totally funny, and the jokes and banter were perfect! they were totally things you would really hear on the show!!!

also, did you write another episode, cuz i only saw the terminator one, but the way people were talking it souded like there were two...