Hi everyone. Many of you may be following @NealBaer on twitter. For those of you who are not or who would like to respond to this, after the Q & A today, many of us feel that it's important to talk to him about Olivia's experience with Sealview and how it would ACTUALLY affect her. We want to make sure that the show continues to support survivors of sexual assault and not portray a message that "Olivia Benson magically got over her assault so why can't I"? If there is anything that you would like to contribute to this letter, please feel free to send me a message, and I will be happy to incorporate this. If you would like your privacy respected and wish not to include your name, that is absolutely fine. If you are a survivor or advocate who has worked with survivors and would like to include this so that he knows where your "knowledge" comes from, feel free to include this as well. Please send this to me as soon as possible as one of the editors, Nancy has graciously agreed to give this to him for us, and I know that her schedule is very busy after this week.

A couple of quick notes--please try to keep this as concise as possible (believe me, anyone who knows me knows how difficult this is). Also, please be respectful. From everything I've heard from the cast and crew, Neal seems to be a great guy. However, he's in a tough place because the premise behind the show is that each episode is not supposed to be built on things that have happened previously. I honestly think this is why they have chosen to address the issue as they have. However, I firmly believe it is an important message that needs to come across in the right way and would appreciate any support that you can offer. I know that all of us come from different places, and especially come to this show for different reasons. We don't want to attack Neal--we just want to help him understand our personal experiences with the matter and the importance of presenting this issue in the best manner possible.

Jackie (aka @arabesque01)

Gosh, Arebesque!

All I want for Liv is for her to get laid... However, you are a rockstar and I will do whatever I can to support you in this.


ANDREA

Ah, thanks Andrea. I'm hoping to be back to the boards here by the end of this week. Things are finally settling down here so we'll see how it goes...

I was starting to think you abandon the board for twitter

No, but I can twitter from my phone. It's a little harder to hit the boards from it. I'm finally getting settled, regular internet access, and my computer fixed which will make it MUCH easier to come around again.

I know you don't get over it fast or anything, I know that first hand. But for the sake of the show I think they let her move on. Don't you think if it kept on effecting her, that they wouldn't let her do her job and that they would put her on leave or make her get out of the department all together?

It can affect her and not stop her from doing her job, especially if she is actively trying to work through it. Yes, it changes how she is on the job, but Olivia has yet to be completely impartial on a case yet. She's always been too involved--and while she certainly has times where that has been a fault, it is also one of the things that makes her such a great detective. It doesn't have to be a bad thing, but it does send a bad message to pretend that she hasn't had to deal with it and it has all of a sudden gotten "better". We need to see that she is affected by it, even if it's just in small ways-the sound of the handcuffs when she slaps them on a perp, a familiar scent that brings her back to that moment, etc. She doesn't have to become completely unstable and break down into tears. But she has been something that is very traumatic. She's going through RTS/PTSD, and that isn't something that just goes away. The show needs to follow through with what they've started. There are good ways and bad ways of doing that, but it can't just be something that goes away.

EDIT: Okay, letter went out today...thanks to everyone who contributed.

I have to agree about it still affecting her and not stopping her from doing her job,her particular job probably gives her a better understanding of whats happening to her but that dosen't mean she can move on so quickly,its a very traumatic thing to have happen and it can take years to recover from the experience, so I think that its very important that the producers show this throughout the series,even if it only shows Olivia walking into a counselling session,then people(women) will see that recovery is an on going thing and does take time

Exactly. I think that's probably one of the hardest things for her to accept--knowing what she's going through and not being able to stop herself from feeling that. She's worked with so many survivors, she knows what to expect, but she has no control over feeling any of it. And that's a really difficult thing for her, especially at a time where she feels like she has no control anyway. You are correct--she absolutely shouldn't be moving on quickly. She can still do her job and be affected by it at the same time. Survivors have bad days, but they also have good days. She doesn't have to stop functioning or doing her job, but she does have to acknowledge that she is affected by it, that she is surrounded by triggers that will continue to remind her of what happened, and that it does take time and a lot of effort. I don't think we need entire episodes devoted to it, but your example of showing that she's in counseling (and actually PARTICIPATING in counseling which is something we have yet to see) or talking to those that are important in her life about what happened (as difficult as that is--it's also a huge step forward to be able to do that), etc. Or show us that something reminds her of that--show us that she's afraid to lock her door...or afraid not to. Show us that the sound of handcuffs makes her cringe, etc. Just don't pretend it never happened or that she doesn't still fight with how it affects her.

Arabesque/Jackie
I completely agree with everything you say and I think this is a good oppertunity for the TPTB to get this right especially if they take your letter into consideration.I was wondering if you are going to post a draft of the letter I would really like to read it?

Even though everyone who contributed has given an okay to share it, I don't feel comfortable openly posting it because it does contain some very personal stories. If you PM me an email address, I would be happy to email you a copy. Nancy told me she wants to give it to Neal in person next week when he returns to LA. If we get a response, and if Neal says it's okay to share that response, I will be happy to keep everyone updated on what happens.

I have sent you a PM, I hope you get it,let me know if you don't,I'm still not quite sure how things work,Goodnight for now I'm off to bed