Oh no, Meme, that's horrible news. I hope your daughters house is safe and....well, this time tell that bald headed old fart you get the RV, all the insurance and every da*n piece of anything in the house. Then you come up here in the RV and Raven and I will take care of you while we plot our revenge of "hell hath no fury."

We have 'kiwi' scrunchers...they work real good, last used them to dekiwi the little bulls down on the farm, made a piece of veal out of them.

Mucho hugs my bestest friend. Cry on my shoulder anytime...

Huggies and smoochies,

Sue

You have a lot of stuff hitting the fan and I hope you come back soon. I hope everything turns out all right with your husband, and if not, I hope you have a nice big crawl space....or at least, a backhoe. Your problems right now are one real big reason I stopped dated years ago. I don't want to be all negative but sometimes I think men are just dead inside. I know what kind of pain you're in right now. Keep your head up.

They got a vintage Victrola 1951
Full of my favorite records that I grew up on
They got ole Hank and Lefty and there's B24
Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor’.

Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor’
I'm gonna spend the night like every night before
Playin' ET and I'll play him some more
I've gotta have a shot of them old troubadours.

Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor’.
Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor’.

All my neon neighbors they like what I play
Cause they've heard it every night since you've walked away
Every day they replace old B24
'Cause every night I run a needle through ‘Walking The Floor’

Every night I run a needle through ‘Walking The Floor’.
I'm gonna spend the night like every night before
Playin' ET and I'll play him some more
I've gotta have a shot of them old troubadours.

Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor’
Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor’
I said set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor'
Set 'em up Joe, and play ‘Walking The Floor'.


I got the next round.

Make mine a double....

Before the rains came we were trapping 50 mosquitoes a week, since the rains came we are trapping 4000 a day! They tell us not to worry, these are only flood mosquitoes and don't carry West Nile....well, golly gee whiz, these buggers still bite like a dog with rabies. Walk outside and they hit you in a swarm, I look like one giant chicken pox and my poor dog, his muzzle and eyes are so bumped up and itchy he's rubbing his fur off.

Takes the fun out of being out of doors during this long week end.

Well, my grandmother calls today to see how Bob, our ex- neighbor with Lukemia, was doing. And his girlfried was so, so sorry that she didnt call. Bob passed on Friday.

Nancy Spain from down the street passed almost two weeks ago but the neighborhood ladies still havent stopped fighting over her stuff.

Today, my step-dad/room-mate/dont-ask, Larry is spending the night at the hospital, as his mother who is quite old has pnemonia and isnt expected to last.

The first person close to me died about 3 years ago, then about a year later the next one, then nine months later... And now it's becoming bi-weekly with people waiting in the wings to go out next...

Is it possible to wade in to death like a swamp? To just suddenly turn around and find yourself hip deep in it with no clue how you got there?

Bartender! Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster - and make it a double!

-M

Cool. Does your head flip back?

Only when I'm dispensing Pez.

It was shocking to hear Bob passed. You have my deepest sympathies.

Yeah. He was really, really cool. It's weird how he moved right before he died... It's like a wolf leaving the pack to die... i dont know. I expected it so much for so long that... It's sad but not suprising.

I dont know if I ever told the forum about the time my mother and my ex-girlfriend stole my photo albums from my childhood out of my storage and destroyed them. But it happened.

Well, tonight I asked my grandmother if I could go through all the old pictures and build myself a new album or two. And she said of course, so i've been leafing pictures all day too.

It's amazing, looking back at pictures of my real early childhood and all the changes, all the people and pets and places that came and went - and all those emotions that go with them...

My heaad is full and primed to dream. When i feel like this I always dream wild and crazy stuff. I dont jump up from a nightmare anymore but I do wake up on occasion telling myself "Well that was freaking disturbing!" and that's the threat in the air about knowing I'm going to dream hard. It's all "What will I get?"

The upside is I got some real nice pictures and started a cool little album. <shrug> It's something, right?

-M

M-

I am so sorry to hear about Bob passing away!

That sounds like a nice way to spend a day. My mother and sister stole all my pictures of my son from when he was a baby--I have just a couple hoarded away but now that he's 20, I feel like ninja-raiding their house and getting all my pictures back. I'd love to see you post some of those photos your thumbing through right now. Share 'em with the gang, will ya?

My grandma has thousands of pictures of me when I was younger that I didn't even know existed. She lectured me about always being goofy in the pictures:

New Year's Eve, 1999-All the cousins, aunts and uncles are all around the fireplace smiling sweetly for a family picture....there's me making a goofy face in the midst of that.

Age 8, my cousin's graduation party-Another nice family picture...I'm right there in the front row practically choking my other cousin.

Age 10, Thanksgiving party-Me and my aunt are on the couch, I'm holding my newborn baby cousin with my glasses hanging down in the sophisticated, nerd position, my hair sticking straight up everywhere.

Oh, and there was a video too!

Age 6, Christmas Eve Party-Obviously my cousins were raised around the much more proper and polte area than what I'm used to. My uncle videotaped us all singing "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" we sang the sub-verses too. When it got to "Then one foggy Christmas eve, Santa came to say..." All my cousins sang out "Ho! Ho! Ho!" while I was the only brat in the front who shouted "In his underwear!" Terrible. Good times, good times.

Anyway, I think it'd be funny to make a thread where the users on this board post their little kid pictures. So cute, so funny at the same time.

-Chik

Oh yeah, sorry about, your friend, Bob, passing.

Sounds like you made every one of those pictures hilarious and adorable all at the same time! Scan 'em, post 'em....come on, you know you wanna! Let me dig out my kid pic....

Okay, I'll show you mine if you show me yours. Again--I have no idea how to resize these. It let's you go through the motions of resizing in here and then when you click "submit," they're back to full size.

Edit: Okay, in the interests of not looking ridiculous, I posted them on a separate page of my website. I hate that you have to hotlink here to view pictures but if anyone knows something I don't, feel free to tell me how to resize pictures in here. In the meantime, here's the link.

Okay, who's next? I wanna see baby pictures!

<Mandeville lights a candle in the window for Meme>

Yeah, where is she? She sounded pretty ticked when she posted about this. She just might be in her back yard digging holes.....

The prolonged absense of good people sucks loads. And you can quote me on that.

-M

I completely agree!

I thought shee said she and hubby were camping this month, someplace close to home, so she'd be coming home to do laundry and checking the board while she was at it.

I hope she checks in soon, I worry about her when we don't hear from her.

I seem to recall the same sort of thing but I wasnt sure, given her last post, that the plan was still in place.

But I'm sure we'll hear something soon.

...

Right?

-M

Hope so. I am really sorry about Bob, M.

It's so funny that you would talk about old photographs because I've been looking at old photos for quite a while now. A week ago I got a new scanner with which you can also scan slides. So I grabbed the old slides from 1985 and scanned them. I thought they were really touching and beautiful so I printed them and filled a photoalbum with them which I gave to my grandparents. They enjoyed it very much and gave us photos from the 50s which are not only nice to look at but some of them are also just hilarious. I think looking at old photographs is a great way to spend the day.

I love looking at old photographs. I also think it is a great way to spend the day.

Speaking of photographs...do any of you ever make photo albums/scrapbooks after travelling? Well I don't but our neighbours do. My parents have often warned me that the albums are utterly boring but I thought culture couldn't be boring...I should have thought twice. A while ago our neighbours went to Japan. We were staying with them in Croatia for a few days and one evening they asked us if we wanted to see the album and we said yes (we shouldn’t have). The album contained lots of photos showing all the same things, little footnotes and fun facts on the bottom and, yes, even a few tickets were in there. Our neighbour had a “unique” story for almost each one of the photos and when we finally reached the end of the album she said to me "Michael, would you turn around and hand me the second album?“ Ugh. So we looked at that one, too and when we finished it they set up the tv to show us the movie, of which there were two parts, too. See, if the movie would have been interesting or funny I wouldn't have minded watching it but they just filmed one old building for several minutes and then the next one for several minutes (and sometimes even the floor because they didn’t have the camera entirely figured out). I mean, they could have talked while filming to spice it up a little but it was practically a silent movie. In the movie there was a building that was particularly high and our neighbour couldn't remember how many stories it had so she got her travel diary to look it up but then she said "No, it doesn't say here. But I think I mentioned it on my audiotape." At that point I found it very hard not to burst out laughing but somehow I managed. In my opinion pictures and movies (and diaries and audiotapes) will never replace actually being there so I wouldn't even bother putting so much work in things like that. But I guess some people get a kick out of it.

Man, I would LOVE to. But, I don't have a scanner. Maybe, when I go to visit my grammy. She has a scanner!

You have some nice pictures! I like the one of you at 18 months. Cute! The note you posted at the top of the page too. lol.

-Chik

M...sorry to hear of Bob's passing...Have you talked with his girlfriend much since you heard...is she doing ok?

I am sure that Meme will return shortly and she will let us know what has happend since...

Hi Migosch! Haven't seen you here for a while - course I haven't been very active so maybe I just missed your posts.

Anyway - I love old pictures and I make scrapbooks, too. Fortunately, I am the opposite of your friends. I flash the books and pictures so fast, no one can see what I wrote - I just think it is so boring. I make the scrapbooks for me and my children with the sense of being the family historian. Its hard for me to just hand someone the book and walk away so they can look at it at their own pace, but I try. My best friend sneaks a look when I am doing something else!

Your description was priceless! My husband would be going nuts by that point! He would never make it beyond the first scrapbook.

I havent got to talk to his girlfriend myself, but she had family here and such so I know she's got support if she needs it. My grandmother said she sounded like you'd expect. Upset, tired, low.

As for Mem... I'm still waiting. <Changes candle in window> These things burn up you know.

-M

Okay this is completely random but I have to ask: Have you ever been on automatic pilot and just said something without fully comprehending what the person you were talking to was actually saying? I do it a lot when saying goodbye to someone. Sort of when they might be saying "Have a good day," and you say "you too," and then realize they didn't just say "Have a good day"--they said something completely different?

Mmkay, I was napping and the guy upstairs knocked on the door--of course I had to jump a foot off the couch first. So I answer the door and he's asking if my son is home. We have our whole conversation at the door but I've been jarred from a nap so I'm hearing maybe half of it. It's like when Bush is on the TV....I see his lips moving, but.....

So then this guy's ready to take off and he says something. Out of force of habit, I say "You too." I shut the door and realize that what he said was "Well, enjoy your nap." Um, he wasn't taking a nap. He was getting ready to drive to CC's for pizza.

Here's some other things I've blurted out "you too" to:

"Good luck on your pelvic exam"--might have played off if we were in the gyno's waiting room but we weren't....and the speaker was MALE.
"Sorry to hear your Grandmother died"--this guy's Grandmother was alive and well.
"Drive safe"--I was driving. The speaker was standing at their front door in their PJs and slippers.
"Well, call us later if you need a ride back."--guy was a cab driver, dropping me off at the store.


They just kind of look at me like "so sorry to hear you're stupid."

You too.

Now that was just mean. rofl!! Yeah, I'm a waterhead.

I was just teasing. I do the same thing. I think I spend half my life on autopilot.

The worst is saying "you too" and then realizing you have NO IDEA what the other person just said.

I find I nod and smile a lot more than I used to.

I knew you were teasing--that's why I put the in there. rofl. I do that all the time and then feel ridiculous afterward. I'm not good on long conversations, especially on the phone. After a while, I zone out and go into "okay we can stop talking some time soon" mode. That's when the automated response system kicks in. Invariably, I end up sticking my foot in my mouth. rofl.



"To inquire about my relatives, press 1....to wish me a good day, press 2.....to discuss the weather, press 3.....to ask about my health, press 4.....to end this call, press star, or simply hang up...."

I was once on the phone with my mom -- before she got really sick. She was one really long-winded woman. I fell asleep while she was talking.

Some people just go on and on (I hate the phone anyway) -- I multitask on the computer. It's not until you hear a pause that you know you're in trouble.

I fell asleep talking to a friend on the phone once. She uttered a few expletives and hung up on me. I woke up about a half hour later with the dial tone going off in my ear.

How do we get this put on our phones? I think its great only I would have to add something for telemarketers.

Barkeep - get me a Cherry Dr. Pepper while I think about this. Thanks!

"To sell me a satellite dish that I don't want press 1... To tell me about my car warranty that I don't want to discuss right now, press 2... To ask for a donation for aging orangatans, press 3... To tell me about an important announcement that I am not interested in press 4... If you are still listening you should know that buttons 1-4 will cause you to be ejected from your chair and sent into space along with all the other space junk that is orbiting the earth. In 5,4,3...

On a different note, kinda, I actually like it when the people who call me are mad. I dont generally upset anyone on my own you see, but I take a lot of undeserved flack from time to time. So I really enjoy sidestepping the undeserved guilt trip.

I cant tell you how many times someone has called me, exploding mad about something, dispensing a seeting tirade - and provided I dont get roped in to an argument, as soon as they're done I say "Who is this?" As though I couldnt possibly figure it out. Like it's a total mystery and no matter how intimate or unique thier complaint - they could just be anyone in a crowd.

Horrible as it may be, that is one very satisfying feeling.

I think I got the idea from watching Seinfeld. George calls Jerry and he's going crazy about something they had just talked about and Jerry just smiles and says "Who is this?" And George snaps "JUST DO IT! GO DO IT!"

I miss that show. It was good.

-M

P.S. - If what you're calling about will tick me off, please press seven...

I used to get calls all the time for credit cards with cash advances. I finally went on a creative rant one day about how I had more money than I needed and I already owned everything I ever wanted. Why would I need more money?!

They really had nothing else to say.

I think I do the driving equivalent -
Like if I were to accidently cut someone off, or change lanes abruptly or do a u-turn (I learned that in Texas where everyone just goes their own way) or I am lost and I just stop, (I don't really do these things - they're just examples you understand) and

If someone were to say - throw a fit - you know with that special finger and all, I just don't look.

It is very satisfying because if you never look at them, they can rant and rave and gesture, but its like it never happened. (me humming, la la la, looking the other way, hmmmmm huh? Did something happen?)

I miss Seinfeld because of the categories of unacceptable people that they introduced - you know "man-hands' and "close-talkers". It was an education.

I like to laugh and point when I can - when I get the finger. But a lot of time I'm driving. So it doesnt always work out.

That was you? Were you ever in Kansas? Cause I think I saw you!

For New years 3 years ago I took a trip that involved coming home through Kansas. So... Could have been.

-M

I see meme's back. How is everything going? How was your fourth of july weekend?

Things are quiet at the Soap Box Bar and Grill. It's mid-afternoon on a sweltering July day, and everyone has Mint Juleps in their hands and are waiting for the Marco Polo games to begin.
Out in the parking lot, there is a Mighty Cloud Of Dust and A Hearty "Touch those spurs, Bub, and you'll be singing first row soprano with the Mormon Tabernacle."
Suddenly, the door to the Bar and Grill slams open and we hear a loud and raucous
Get the H**L out of my way---I've got people to see and drinks to gulp."

Yes, folks, it is me, Meme, you know, um, Memebeck Stottlemeyer.

Thank you all sooooooo much for the loving words, broad shoulders and Helpful Body Disposal Hints. No wonder I love ya all so much. It truly did make me feel better to come here a few minutes ago and feel all the love here.

Ok, FYI in case you give a rat's a*s:
I have now moved to a different state to live with my brother. I'm too old and tired to be kicked around like has been going on for the past 5 years. (Not literally kicked---we would be renting the backhoe to use in the crawl space then.) Not to bore you further with my own personal Soap Opera, suffice it to know Meme is doing okay,, all settled into a new town, and determined to spend my time spoiling me now. And, doing a lot of soul-searching and discovering that I miss my dog more than the bald-headed Old Fart. What a sad commentary on 29 years of my life.

Anywho---no internet at home but will stop off at the library in town here a couple times a week and be back playing in the sandbox soon.

Love to all, and thanks again--
Meme Stottlemeyer

I love your outlook and it's good to see you did something positive with your situation. Do what needs to be done and then move forward. Glad you're back.

I'm glad to hear you're okay Meme. I was worried.

I wish we could just pick a town and one by one move there to have a Monk community.

Of course that could be because my ex-besst friend and my ex-girlfriend turned up right in front of me today in a store I frequent daily.

Talk about bringing out the worst in people.

My tongue felt like it was made of bloody razors and everything felt far away.

I started to get lightheaded and my hands were spasming involuntarily.

I just turned around, walked out of the store and left.

I took two stress pills when I got home and fell asleep for a bit but my attitude is still skewed.

"Every time I turn around, it's in my face!" OMC, How Bizzarre

-M

I can understand what you're feeling--I was once seeing a man that also worked at the same place I worked and every time I saw him afterward, I was seething. I had to come to realize that I was the one who dumped him and that I had a reason for that.

I stopped seeing my son's father as well and though it was my decision, I was very much in love with him and cried for weeks afterward. My emotions can't overrule my head, ever, and I knew it wasn't going to work out--both men had a problem with finding their way home at night, if you know what I mean. Both also started acting violent--I never got hit but both threatened to and I don't put up with that.

I stopped getting angry whenever I saw my ex--I had to wait until I stopped hurting and then I knew I was better off without him. That's why I broke it off in the first place. It sounds like you're still in the hurt stage. It'll pass.

If they can both go behind your back and do what they did, then they deserve each other. What they're going to find out is that if they can do what they did to you, then sooner or later, they're going to do it to each other. That's when you get to sit back and watch "what goes around" come around to them. I feel your pain. Been there, done that.

Welcome Back, Meme!! We missed you!!

Well, my grandmother mentionsed to my back biting aunt that I saw Jen and Adam, so my Aunt, Nadeed, called Jen to tell her that I ws upset by seeing them, because she likes to laugh at pein behind it's back.

And what they came back with was - maybe I was wrong and it only REALLY looked like them, as they deny being there.

But what good did that do anybody excet to stretch this out another day and involve all the volitile people at once.

Now I ask you, is that how people heal? Or is this how sh*t is stirred up and arguments created out of nothing?

It's like I cant have a feeling on my own - we'd better verify that he feels bad by making it all way, way worse.

<shakes head> Why is my life like this?

-M

The fact that your aunt called your ex girlfriend to report the sighting is absolutely bizarre. I don't see malice in your grandmother saying anything--maybe a lack of discretion or she doesn't really know what your aunt is like. You may have to keep future sightings to yourself, which will be difficult if it upsets you and she wonders why you're upset--make something up.

You can get over it a lot quicker without outside interference. If you happen to see her or him or them again, remember--don't feed the bears.

Love this quote...it is so true!