Some of my fav House/Wilson quotes:

Wilson: "You know why people are nice to other people?"
House: "Oh, I know this one. Because people are good, decent and caring. Either that, or people are cowards. If I'm mean to you, you'll be mean to me. Mutually assured destruction."
Wilson: "Exactly...."
House: "You gonna get to your point?"
Wilson: "You need people to like you."
House: "I don't care if people like me."
Wilson: ..."Yes. But you need people to like you because you need people. Unless you think you can get the next court order yourself. If Stacy can't trust you, you can't use her. And that's not even dealing with the greater agenda — of getting her to dump her husband and fall in love with you all over again."
---------------------------------------------------------
House: "I recognize that confidence is not my short suit. I also recognize that I am human and capable of error."
Wilson: "So you might have screwed this up?"
House: "No."
Wilson: "So, it's only a theoretical capacity for error."
House: "Good point. Maybe there isn't one. Maybe that's my error."
Wilson: "You know, most people who think as much of themselves as you do like to talk about themselves."
House: "Most people don't like to listen, so what's wrong with you?"
------------------------------------------------------
Wilson: "You're my friend."
House: "Oh, jeez. Have some backbone. If you think I'm wrong, do something."
Wilson: "Wait, you're getting mad at me for sticking up for you?"
House: "You value our friendship more than your ethical responsibilities."
Wilson: "Our friendship is an ethical responsibility."

House: Camron write this down
Camron: Oh now I get to touch the markers.
At least i think thats what they said

House: [snatching the marker back from Foreman, who was writing on the board]"Sorry, there's a reason they call it the Whiteboard . It's not my rule. What ties both of these conditions together?"
Foreman: [when the others can't come up with anything that ties the two conditions together]"OK, we can all stare at each other or we can investigate what caused the heart failure. Just the heart failure. You wanna give me that Blackmarker?"

House: (about a lecture) I'm not doing it. (leaves, then stops) You're supposed to stop me. Renegotiate.

Dr. Cuddy: Hmm, and you were supposed to keep on walking. Sorry, I guess we both screwed up. Go on, do it again.

I just love all the things House say's they are sooo funny!

This one cracked me up. From the Season 3 premiere

[Yoga girl breathing hard from tightness in her chest. House walks in]

House: Relax, I'm not going to burn you again...I'm going to STAB YOU!! [whips out syringe]

House: You idiot...

LOL

[during a epidemic at princeton plainsburough hospital, people are watching close by as dr. chase is trying to perform a bone marrow biopsy on a 12 year old girl, a very complicated procedure]

Dr. Chase: [turns to Dr. Foreman] "Yell fire or something"

tahha



<33

haha =D

this one is in my signature but i'll post it


Hosue: "what are those?"

Cameron: "there candy canes"

House: "candy canes! are you mocking me?"

I read that everytime i see you post, and i laugh every time! Do you, or anyone else for that matter know what eppy that's from? I'd love to get to see and hear it....
Thanks!
~BensonFanatic~

I'm not going to write mine sice it my signiture.

its in damned it you do, season 1 here is the web site i found it at...

quotes.

Thanks!

not a problem. i was wondering myself. i couldnt remeber what the eppy name was.

House has many good quotes, guaranteed to get you laughing; these are my favorites, sorry if I didn't put where I got it.

"Like I always say, there's no 'I' in 'team.' There is a 'me,' though, if you jumble it up."
- Dr. Gregory House (House, MD.)
******
"If you can fake sincerity, you can fake pretty much anything."
- Dr. Gregory House (House, MD.)
******
"You know how they say, 'you can't live without love'? Well, oxygen is even more important."
- Dr. Gregory House (House, MD.)
******
"Idiots are fun. No wonder every village wants one."
- Dr. Gregory House (House, MD.)
******
" You're lucky he didn't die..."
- Dr. Allison Cameron

" I'm lucky? He's the one who didn't die."
- Dr. Gregory House (House, MD.)
*****
"You kissed back."
- Dr. Allison Cameron to Dr. Gregory



___________________
Rose
Motorcycle Brochures by Kawasaki

Here's one of my favorite speeches from the episode "DNR" from Season 1. House is speaking to Foreman about why he should stay at Princeton with him, rather than go with his old mentor who has offered Foreman a job.

You took a chance, you did something great. You were wrong, but it was still great. You should feel great that it was great. You should feel like crap that it was wrong. That’s the difference between him and me. He thinks you do your job, and what will be, will be. I think that what I do and what you do matters. He sleeps better at night. He shouldn’t.

Cameron: *refering to house's cane* "Flames?"

House: "makes me look like im going fast!"

-laughs-

OH, my fav :

Cuddy : Are you being intentionally dense?
House : Huh?

I don't know if this is on here but....

House:Your mother is suffering from S.A.C.
Girl: S.A.C?
House:Stupid American Child.

Not sure if it's correct but I remember thinking I gotta remember this one.